Chicken Pad Thai .. and I Don't Care!

That's right, wave your hands in the air like you just don't care! One great thing about living on food stamps is that you can cook all those delicious dishes without having to convince the public that you really aren't panhandling for cheap booze. This is Thailand's national dish, a sort of Southeast Asian goulash or chili in how many variations on the theme there are. A great summer dish, too.

Prep time: about 25 mins.

Cooking time: 15 - 20 mins.

Est. servings: about 4

Today's Specimen

Ingredients

main

• 8 oz. (dry) rice pad Thai noodles


• 1½ lb. chicken breast, cubed


• 4 eggs, beaten


• ¼ cup dried arbol chilies, chopped


• 2 cups bean sprouts


• 1 cup carrot, half alumette


• ½ cup green onion, chopped


• ½ cup peanuts, crushed


• 2 tbsp. sesame oil

sauce

• 3 tbsp. sesame oil


• 2 tbsp. peanut sauce


• 1 tbsp. low-sodium soy sauce


• 2 tbsp. rice vinegar


• 4 tbsp. fish sauce


• 1 tbsp. fresh lime juice


• 4 tbsp. & 1 tsp. light agave nectar


• ½ tsp. garlic, mashed


• ¼ tsp. ginger, grated fine


• 1 pinch (about ⅛ tsp.) salt

garnish

• lime wedges (2 per plate)


• 1 cup fresh cilantro, chopped (¼ cup per plate)

Directions

1. Mix the sauce ingredients together in a small bowl or container and set aside to marinate in the fridge for at least an hour. (mash the garlic with the salt.)


2. Boil the rice noodles for about ten minutes and then drain and set aside in a bowl with enough cold water to cover them.


3. In a large wok or frying pan on medium-high heat sauté the chicken in the sesame oil until it turns white but before it browns, about 5 - 7 mins.


4. Add the dried arbulo and beaten eggs and stir-fry until the eggs are firm, about 5 mins.


5. Add the carrot and sauce and cook for another 5 mins.


6. Drop the temperature down to medium and add the rest of the ingredients and simmer for about 5 mins., stirring constantly.


7. Serve immediately with the garnish on the side or applied to each plate.

Next Time in the Lab

The flavor was pretty close to right-on but the sauce was too thin. It could have used a little more heat, too..

• Substitute ⅓ cup dried Tien-Tsin peppers for the ¼ cup dried arbol peppers.


• Substitute ½ cup fresh cilantro for the ½ cup green onion.


• Add ⅔ cup sliced shallots, to be added with the carrot when carrot and sauce when cooking.


• Substitute 1 tbsp. chili oil for 1 tbsp. of the sesame oil in the sauce.


• Substitute 1 tbsp. creamy natural peanut butter for the peanut sauce in the sauce.


• Substitute 6 tbsp. evaporated cane juice or turbinado sugar for the light agave nectar in the sauce.


• Add a small leaf of basil (about ¼ tsp. when rolled or bunched up) to the sauce while it marinates and leave the sauce to marinate at least 4 hours, preferably overnight. Remove it before adding the sauce when it comes time to cook the dish.

Asiago-Stuffed Bell Peppers

This is something I threw together with the last of some of the items I had in the fridge, so it's very much a prototype. Stuffed bell peppers really make a great meal, the sort of thing that goes perfectly with a small side of soup — maybe a squash soup.

Prep time: about 50 mins. (incl. filling)

Cooking time: about 35 mins.

Est. servings: 4

Today's Specimen

Ingredients

• 4 green bell peppers, tops cut off


• ½ lb. mild Italian pork sausage


• 1 cup brown Basmati or jasmine rice


• ⅓ cup portabella mushroom, diced


• ¼ cup red onion, diced


• 1 tsp. garlic, mashed


• 3 capers, mashed with garlic


• ¼ cup Asiago fresco cheese, grated


• ½ cup chicken broth


• 1 cup water

Directions

1. Preheat the oven to 350°F and make sure a baking pan or sheet of tin foil is on the middle rack.


2. In a large saucepan on medium heat cook the rice in the water and the chicken broth, adding water as needed until it's fully cooked and fluffy. It's brown rice, so this will take 40 - 45 mins.


3. While you at it and out there, may as well cook the other stuff. In a large frying pan on medium heat start cooking the sausage, crumbling into fine chunks with a good heat-resistant spatula. After it's mostly browned add the mushroom, red onion, and mashed garlic and caper and cook for an additional 10 minutes, stirring constantly. Remove from the heat and set aside.


4. Once the rice is fully cooked add the sausage and vegetable mixture to the rice and fold into the rice, adding the Asiago in two increments and stirring thoroughly to ensure it'ss blended evenly in.


5. Gently stuff the bell peppers with the filling to the tops of the peppers and cover each of them with their tops to ensure the contents remain moist. Bake for 30 - 35 mins.

Next Time in the Lab

Yeah, I didn't even use any spices; I figured the sausage, cheese, and the capers would suffice. Close, but not quite cheesy enough and the filling can use a hint of tartness that Asiago suggests.

• Increase the portabella to 1 cup.


• Increase the red onion to ⅔ cup.


• Add ½ cup cilantro.


• Increase the garlic to 1 tbsp. and mash with ¼ tsp. salt.


• Increase the capers to 6 and mash with the garlic and salt.


• Add ¼ tsp. white pepper.


• Add 1 tsp. white vinegar

Chili Asparagus Soup

I found myself sitting on a pile of asparagus after I cut the tips off for the side of spicy chili garlic asparagus I prepared a week ago. What to do? This is the result, pretty much an off the top of my head creation that panned out surprisingly well. One great thing about asparagus is that it makes your pee and poop stinky — I'm so mature.

Prep time: about 10 mins.

Cooking time: about 1½ hours.

Est. servings: 2.

Today's Specimen

Ingredients

• 1 bunch (about 2 cups) asparagus, minus tips


• 6 (about 2 tbsp.) dried arbulo peppers


• 1 tbsp. fresh garlic


• ⅓ cup green onion, chopped


• ¼ carrot, shredded


• 1 (14 oz.) can low-sodium chicken broth


• 1 tsp white vinegar


• 1 tbsp. unsalted butter


• 2 tbsp. all-purpose flour


• ¼ tsp. cumin


• ¼ tsp. salt


• ⅛ white pepper

Directions

1. Steam the asparagus, using 2 to 2½ cups water, for about ten minutes or until the asparagus is soft.


2. Process the asparagus with 1 cup of the water left over from steaming and the garlic and dried arbulo peppers, until the asparagus is pureed and the peppers broken into small pieces.


3. On medium-low heat in a medium pot (min. 2 qt. capacity) melt the butter and then add the flour o1 tbsp. at a time, whisking with a fork until a thick roux is formed, then continue to cook and stir for about five minutes.


4. Turn the temperature up to medium and add 6 oz. of the water left over from steaming the asparagus, whisking until the roux is well blended into the liquid and a thickened uniform mixture results and begins to bubble from the heat. Then add the chicken broth, one half a can at a time, stirring and waiting for the mixture to bubble like with the water left over from steaming the vegetables. You want to do this to ensure a properly uniform texture, without the texture being mealy or the soup tasting like flour.


5. Add the processed puree, white vinegar, green onion, carrot, and spices and turn the temperature down to low and allow to simmer for half an hour, stirring once or twice, never allowing the soup to come to a full boil. After half an hour drop the temperature down so that the soup just remains hot but doesn't simmer, for at least half an hour but preferably an hour and a half. Add a little water every now and then if needed.

Next Time in the Lab

Fresh peppers would probably be better, and less of them since they overpowered the asparagus a bit.

• Substitute 3 fresh arbulo peppers for the 6 dry ones, and dice them finely instead of processing them in with the asparagus.


• Increase the green onion to ½ cup.


• Increase the carrot to ⅓ cup.

Summer Dill Salad

I found a recipe for a salad like this on a tag on some carrots I bought at a store one day, years ago, and this is the result of my effort to recreat it. This is the perfect summer picnic side, slightly tangy and sweet, to accompany the potato or macaroni salad.

Prep time: about 10 mins.

Cooking time: none.

Est. servings: 8.

Today's Specimen

Ingredients

• 2 cups red onion, small dice


• 2 cups carrot, peeled and small dice


• ⅔ cup fresh dill, chopped fine


• ⅓ cup extra virgin olive oil


• ½ cup apple cider vinegar


• ¼ tsp. salt

Directions

1. Just toss it all in a mixing bowl and stir so that everything is evenly distributed and coated with the liquid solution. Place in the fridge for at least four hours — preferably overnight — stirring occasionally.

Next Time in the Lab

I think this calls for some cucumber!

• Add 1⅓ cup small-diced cucumber.


• Reduce the red onion to 1⅓ cup.


• Reduce the carrot to 1⅓ cup.

Spicy Chili Garlic Asparagus

There's a couple Thai restaurants in town that have served two variations of this, one breaded and fried and the other swimming in a sauce. I decided to make a much simpler variation that's primarily a marinade but was crafted as a simple side for a padh Thai dish I made for a friend of mine. The next time I make these, I have a feeling they'll go into some bloody maries.

Prep time: about 5 mins.

Cooking time: none.

Est. servings: 2.

Today's Specimen

Ingredients

• Thin asparagus tips from 1 lb. bunch asparagus


• 4 tbsp. chili garlic paste


• 1 tbsp. low sodium soy sauce


• 2 tsp. rice vinegar


• 1 tbsp. sesame oil


• 1 tsp. fresh ginger, grated


• ¼ tsp. salt

Directions

1. It doesn't get any easier than this: just mix everything but the asparagus tips and pour into a sealable bag, add the asparagus and remove as much air as you can and fold so all of the asparagus is immersed in or covered by the marinade. Cook it however you like, or let it sit in the fridge for a day or two and eat raw or rinse off and stick into bloody maries.

Next Time in the Lab

I always cringe when I read the non-food ingredients on these bottles, so I'm going to make my own chili garlic paste next time and use that. Adding some fresh basil also sounds good, and maybe I'll try a dab of hoisin to see how it affects the flavor.

• Make 4 oz. of chili garlic paste by processing 4 arbulo peppers with 1 cayenne pepper, 1 Thai pepper, 1 medium clove of garlic, 1 tsp. rice vinegar, 1 tsp. water, and ¼ tsp. salt.


• Add 1 fresh basil leaf (about 1 tsp.) and process with the paste.


• Add ¼ tsp. hoisin sauce.


• Omit the additional ¼ tsp. salt.


• Add ½ — 1 tsp. water to thin slightly if necessary.

Creamy Mustard Potato Salad 2

About as American as hamburgers, no summer picnic or barbecue can be complete without one. Unfortunately, I can't stand the garbage sold in the stores and what most people make because the potatoes are undercooked, they're swimming in a veritable ocean of mayonnaise, or there's those chunks of hardboiled egg in them that are awkward for my palate. Time to show niggs how it's done. This recipe is a continuation.

Prep time: about 30 mins.

Cooking time: about 30 mins.

Est. servings: 12

Today's Specimen

Ingredients

• 4 large Russet potatoes (about 8 cups)


• ½ cup yellow onion, small dice


• 3 tbsp. pitted Kalamata olives, quartered


• 3 tbsp. dill pickle, fine dice


• 3 tbsp. diced pimento


• 1 egg, hard-boiled


• 4 tbsp. mayonnaise


• 2 tbsp. plain lowfat yogurt


• 1 tbsp. yellow mustard


• 2 tbsp. dill pickle juice


• 2 tbsp. Kalamata olive juice


• ½ tsp. mustard powder


• ¼ tsp. white pepper


• ½ tsp. salt

Directions

1. Prep the dill pickle, kalamata olives, pimentos, and yellow onion and set aside in a small bowl. There's no need to excessively drain the juice, but do drain a litle.


2. In a small bowl mash the hardboiled egg until it's a fine, almost powdery consistency. Add the 2 tbsp. yogurt (or substitute with additional mayonnaise if that's more convenient)
and 2 tbsp. mayonnaise, the 1 tbsp. yellow mustard, the kalamta olive and dill pickle juices, and the mustard powder and the white pepper and the salt, and stir with a fork until it's all blended well. Set aside in the refrigerator, covered.

3. Peel and halve the potatoes and set to steam for about thirty minutes, until they're fully cooked and the outsides are soft. If you're using smaller potatoes it can take only twnety to tweny-five minutes, so at around twenty minutes check every five to make sure you don't overcook your potatoes.


4. Once the potatoes are cooked and have cooled enough to work with, cut them in roughly ¾" cubes and place in a large (at least 2½ qt. capacity) mixing bowl and pour the liquid emulsion solution you set aside into it, along with the preped vegetables. Fold everything into the potatoes, adding mayonnaise one tablespoon at a time. You want a creamy consistency, but using the least amount of mayonnaise necessary; the soft outsides of the potatoes will crumble into the mixture and thicken the potato salad, also. Two more tablespoons of mayonnaise should work, but don't worry about adding an extra one if need be.


5. After everything is blended consistently cover and refigerate for at least four hours — preferably overnight — before serving. A light dusting of paprika and sprinking of fresh parlsey make a great garnish.

Next Time in the Lab

It seemed a little bland to me, so I figure while a couple ingredients may have been extraneous, I could have increased the mustard flavor a bit and aded a touch more salt.

• Increase the yellow mustard added to ¼ cup and omit the mustard powder.


• Increase the salt used to a full teaspoon.

Death by Tuna Chicken Salad

This is a variation of a holiday chicken salad recipe I ran into on Allrecipes.com, located here. Ever since the mercury scare I've shied away from tuna, and I never did care much for the soggy mayo-heavy, unimaginative peasant fare I've always associated with that meat. Why go to the sea to get your chickens, anyway, when there's plenty to be found on land?

Preparation: about 30 mins.

Cooking: about 20 mins.

Servings: 8 — 12

Est. cost: about $9

Today's Specimen

Ingredients

• 4 cups chicken breast, cooked then cubed then shredded.


• ½ cup mayonnaise


• ¾ cup plain lowfat yogurt


• 1 cup dried sweetened cranberries


• ½ cup crushed walnuts


• 1 cup bell peper, diced small


• ½ cup red onion, diced small


• ⅛ tsp. celery seed


• ⅛ tsp. marjoram


• ⅛ tsp. thyme


• ⅛ tsp. lemon zest


• ¼ tsp. white pepper


• 1 tsp. salt

Directions

1. Combine the mayonnaise and yogurt in a small bowl or container and belnd in the lemon zest and spices, and set aside in a refigerator.


2. Steam about four chicken breast halves for about twenty munites, then trim the fat off them and cube with meat scissors or a knife. Transfer — making sure you have exactly 4 cups or just slightly over, but no more than 4¼ cups of the cubed chicken — to a large mixing bowl (min. 2½ qt. capacity) and shred with a masher. Set aside.


3. Prep the vegetable ingredients and combine with the cranberries and crushed walnuts in a medium bowl or container. Set aside.


4. Fold the mayonnaise-yogurt mixture into the shredded chicken until all is disributed uniformly, then fold the vegetables and cranberries and crushed walnuts into the chicken until all is distributed uniformly.


5. Cover and refrigerate at least four hours — preferably overnight — before serving.

Next Time in the Lab

My goal in concocting this variation fo a familiar theme was to avoid what I consider to be a cloying sweetness to the traditional recipes, make it more suitable as a workhorse substitute for that damned poisonous tuna. I may have leapt over the saddle, though, so some minor adjustments are called for.

• Omit the celery seed.


• Substitute freshly crushed black pepper for the white pepper.


• Increase the lemon zest to ¼ teaspoon.


• Increase the thyme to ¼ teaspoon.